A Note on Nostalgia

Dear Old Memories, I miss you.

Without fail, I find myself feeling sentimental around this same time of year. The summer’s blazing sun starts to set sooner every night. The morning wakes me up with a fresh breeze, and crisp leaves crinkle at my feet walking out the door. The wind whispers a sweet sad song, farewell, adieu old friend.

I often catch myself dazing off into space. Dreamily drifting back to old memories, from my deepest past to my most recent days. A tight hug from a love of mine, grasping me with all my edges protected from the August evening sky. A fit of laughter with friends in the twilight. Humid sticky concrete roads wet with dew as my car cruises home. I tend to these memories, nourishing them like plants on a windowsill, keeping them fresh and realized, so as to never forget even the faintest of details.

What is it about fall that makes us more nostalgic than usual? Is it the fleeting feeling of freedom? The panic of rebirth? How will I become myself, even more so this year? Though, January is a ways away for me the end of summer always marked the end of the year. I plead with the universe to bring me good fortune, collecting shells at the beach, cleaning out my wardrobe, shedding the old, and making way for the new.

After the feeling passes and I return to myself, in the present, I often wonder…How will we go on? How can it get better? Will it get worse? I pace around my mind, searching for clues or signs to lead me forward. I wonder about what comes next.

Whilst these worries wane and wax, I realize, anything that shall come to me is meant for me. These new times, the uncertain times, will soon be like the rest of those delicate memories, sitting patiently in my subconscious cozied up next to the others, waiting for their chance to be called upon.

A SOUNDTRACK FOR NOSTALGIA

For a sullen, faint cry in the shower. a scroll through old photos, a stroll in an empty park, a drive past the house of an old fling. For whatever heals.

Don’t fret if you are feeling this way.

Whistle along to the changes of the season, and look forward to all the new adventures that await you.

Bask in the uncertainties, let them warm your soul.

Make space for the new and you will see.. with every new memory added to the bank, your heart will flutter with excitement for more.

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